June 21, 2012

Signs of a Healthy, Godly Female Friend

I recently read an article written by Grace Driscoll on what a Godly female friend looks like. It had some great insights and wisdom and so I thought I'd share her 5 signs of a healthy, godly female friend here:

 1. She will help you grow in your relationship with Christ. If she doesn’t, then you need to make sure you are strong enough to be a witness instead staying stagnant with Jesus. If you aren’t strong enough, then you need to have boundaries or be willing to give up the relationship so that you keep Jesus the priority.

2. She will serve you, and you will serve her. If this is one-sided then you will get taken advantage of or be using her. Friendship isn’t always “even,” but there needs to be mutual serving. If there isn’t, you can kindly confront the issue, and her response will tell you if the friendship is healthy.

3. If you are married, your husband will see her as an asset rather than a hindrance in your marriage. As women, it can tend to be easier for us to be friends with other women than it is with our husband. We more readily share vulnerably with women, confess sin with women, or ask for counsel from women. If our conversations with other women spark division in our marriage it is not godly.

4. When conflict arises or counsel needs to be given, she is willing to both listen and speak into the issue. It is important that both women are teachable or else reconciliation is difficult.

5. As important as healthy friendships are, it is also important to hold them with an “open hand” so that the women don’t become idols whom you worship. She should be someone you enjoy, learn from, and invest in but not someone you put on a pedestal.

"A true friend is one who is walking in, when everyone else is walking out.” – Martin Luther


  1. Great points - thank you for sharing that - it gives me something to remember and work towards with my friendships

  2. You're my neighbour on the Thought Provoking Thursday link up today. Reading this list - it's fantastic! A great way to help us to measure up to being a godly friend, and to ensure our friendships don't interfere with our marriages either.

  3. Thanks for sharing this, Cathy. This is VERY timely for me. Such wise words!

  4. Thanks for sharing this great list! I feel so blessed to have at least one friend who has all these qualities. :)

  5. Excellent points! Too often as women, we see friendship as a "hang time" buddy. And there is nothing wrong with that. But if that is ALL our friendship is, then it is no longer a support and true encouragement to our lives.

    Coming over from Faith Filled Fridays

  6. Great advice - both for determining healthy friendships as well as knowing what kind of friend we should be to others.

    Thanks for linking up!


  7. I've had to learn these lessons the hard way. I recently had to let a friendship go, she wasn't helping me grow in my relationship, and I realized I wasn't strong enough in mine to be more of an influence..it was one of the hardest things I had to do. I still love her and pray for her and we keep in touch, but it's not like before...and it's a good thing.

  8. Thank-you ladies for all sharing. I appreciate all your wonderful comments!


Feel free to leave your own thoughts in the comments. I try to respond to all of them by the end of the week. : )

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